Bij ernstige brandwonden direct korting vragen bij het crematorium.

-A little coitus never hoitus.

-As you are now, I once was. As I am now, you will never be...

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The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you. - Jack Bauer
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Ik haat bumperklevers, en dan met name als ze net voor je rijden...

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The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you. - Jack Bauer
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Ook lekker arrogant:

A Bastard about humans:

- Kill it or ignore it... Anything else honors it

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"http("http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6TUzaW0-K1k") . "\" target=\"_blank\">Wat deze man ook gedaan heeft.. ik vergeef het hem"

Oral sex makes your day; anal sex makes your hole weak.

What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in common?
They can both smell it but can't eat it.

How is a woman like a condom?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

What is the similarity between a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken?
By the time you've finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.

How are tornadoes and marriage alike?
They both begin with a lot of sucking and blowing, and in the end you lose your house.

How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
Kick his sister in the jaw.

What's the difference between Courtney Love and Wayne Gretzky?
Wayne takes a shower after three periods.

What's the difference between love, true love and showing off?
Spitting, swallowing and gargling.

How can you tell if your wife is dead?
The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
Full.

How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?
Put a nipple on it.

What should you do if you girlfriend starts smoking?
Slow down and use a lubricant.

What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild?
Money.

What's the difference between your wife and your job?
After five years your job will still suck.

What's the definition of a male chauvinist pig?
A man who hates every bone in a woman's body, except his own.

Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds?
Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.

What do blondes and the Bermuda triangle have in common?
They've both swallowed a lot of semen.

How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony?
It's not hard.

Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony?
The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.

Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony?
She is the one who can eat the last donut!

What's the difference between a pick pocket and a peeping Tom?
A pick pocket snatches watches.

Why do blondes like tilt steering?
More head room.

What's the difference between a blimp and 365 blow jobs?
One is a Goodyear, and the other is a great year!

What do old women have between their breasts that young women don't?
A bellybutton!

Why do the men in Scotland wear kilts?
Because the sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

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Take my hand and lead me to myself...
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I saw God --------- and she was black

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Refuse to do what you don't want to do.
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Stupid is is stupid does.

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You want some, come get some!!!!!

Lifes like a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get.

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You want some, come get some!!!!!

Quote

Stupid is is stupid does.

Quote

Lifes like a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get.

Iemand heeft Forrest Gump gezien

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The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you. - Jack Bauer
"http($this->addslashes("http://87.233.202.7/stuff/bauer/sig.php")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />"

denk je?

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beliefs are dangerous
beliefs allow a mind to stop functioning
a non-functioning mind is clinically dead

believe in nothing
- Maynard James Keenan

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Is inmiddels al weer een tijdje geleden hoor. Forest Gump is wel een gave film.

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You want some, come get some!!!!!

Look at me, that's me jerking off in the shower..... This will be the high-point of my day.... It's nothing but down-hill from here...

- American Beauty

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"http("http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6TUzaW0-K1k") . "\" target=\"_blank\">Wat deze man ook gedaan heeft.. ik vergeef het hem"

soccer is just a game for guys that can't throw

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"Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what's right - Isaac Asimov"

Time is a great teacher, unfortunately, it kills all of it's students.

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Refuse to do what you don't want to do.
"http("http://www.bastarddomain.com/dev/ico/quote.php") . "\" target=\"_blank\">"http($this->addslashes("http://www.bastarddomain.com/dev/ico/signature.php?show")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />""

If the minimum wasn't acceptable it wouldn't be called the minimum

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Refuse to do what you don't want to do.
"http("http://www.bastarddomain.com/dev/ico/quote.php") . "\" target=\"_blank\">"http($this->addslashes("http://www.bastarddomain.com/dev/ico/signature.php?show")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />""

I told you a million times - Don't exaggerate!

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"http("http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6TUzaW0-K1k") . "\" target=\"_blank\">Wat deze man ook gedaan heeft.. ik vergeef het hem"

i rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

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beliefs are dangerous
beliefs allow a mind to stop functioning
a non-functioning mind is clinically dead

believe in nothing
- Maynard James Keenan

"http($this->addslashes("http://80.247.200.168/stuff/taalbastard.jpg")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />"

If you want my respect, get on your knees and beg for it

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The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you. - Jack Bauer
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If you can't beat them, arange to have them beaten

To save time, let's just agree that I know everything

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The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you. - Jack Bauer
"http($this->addslashes("http://87.233.202.7/stuff/bauer/sig.php")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />"

i know that you know that i know that you know that i know can beat you, so that's why i'm not scared

Who laughs last, thinks the slowest

Don't give me that smart attitude. I already have one

When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you

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The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you. - Jack Bauer
"http($this->addslashes("http://87.233.202.7/stuff/bauer/sig.php")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />"

In het land der blinden kan een één-oog maar moeilijk aan een bril komen

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"http("http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6TUzaW0-K1k") . "\" target=\"_blank\">Wat deze man ook gedaan heeft.. ik vergeef het hem"

The future isn't what it used to be

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The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you. - Jack Bauer
"http($this->addslashes("http://87.233.202.7/stuff/bauer/sig.php")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />"

It's not the fall that hurts, it's that stop at the end

Ik zie een mooie vrouw, ik neem haar waar. Dan doet zich een probleem voor... Waar neem ik haar?

Al is de spreuk nog zo raar, als het rijmt dan is het waar.

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The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you. - Jack Bauer
"http($this->addslashes("http://87.233.202.7/stuff/bauer/sig.php")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />"

Wie voor een dubbeltje geboren is, was in een schandalig goedkoop ziekenhuis!!

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"http($this->addslashes("http://members.home.nl/pverkooyen/telecaster3.jpg")) . "\" border=\"0\" alt=\"[user image]\" />"
What the hell did you do that for?